There's busy and then there's busy

One of the first things people will say to me when they find out that we have 8 kids (after studying my face to see if I'm actually serious) is, "And I thought I was busy!"  My guess is that they look at their lives and then multiply their "busyness" to equal what they think my life looks like with a lot of kids. I don't think they would believe me if I told them that they are most likely busier than me.

There's busy.....and then there's busy!  Clear as mud?  Let me explain.  

I am busy.  We have 10 people in our family.  All of us need to eat, have clean clothes, a clean (but lived in) home, and time to build relationships.  That all takes work, and sometimes a lot of time.  That is what fills my days. But I don't think that's the busy most people are talking about. 

A lot of people have their kids involved in several different activities and families are run ragged trying to make sure that they make it to everything that they are signed up for.  This is not us.  I'm not that kind of busy.

Brett and I have made it a point, and a priority, to limit what our kids are in and how involved they are in activities outside of our home.  This has looked different depending on what season of life we're in.  Currently six of the kids are in karate, one is in symphony and that same one takes two different music lessons.  What that means is that after being home all day, every day, there are 3 afternoons/evenings/nights where we are in town for activities.  The child who is taking lessons doesn't do as much karate because that's the way life is. Sometimes you have to choose, and sometimes you have to say no.

What I've found with this "guarded" schedule is that it gives us, as the parents, the freedom to make sure first things are first.  For us, family time and free time for the kids to be kids (and build relationships with those in our house) trumps any outside activity.  If we are having "a day" (and if you're a parent you know what that means) I reserve the right to say, "We're staying home and getting outside today" or "We'll just do two classes tonight and get home earlier so the little kids can get to bed", etc.  We do not let our children's activities run our family.  Sometimes the big kids have to sacrifice because the little kids can't handle a late night and the little ones certainly put their time in being schlepped around a few afternoons a week.

I feel like approaching busy-ness this way allows me to gauge how things are going.  If I'm feeling particularly stressed out or if I notice the kids are snippy and constantly arguing then that usually means we are all trying to do too much.  Reassessing who is doing what and when is my first go-to approach of bringing peace back into the house.  I will admit that sometimes my solution is to quit absolutely everything and stay home all the time.  When I feel that way usually there is something else to blame, not my kids' activities.  The temptation to throw in the towel usually boils up when I'm not keeping up on laundry or the groceries or the housework and not because I haven't had time to do it.

One other point that I want to bring up about this insane busy-ness business is this.  Rarely have I met any one person that is absolutely phenomenal at multiple things.  Of course exceptions exist.  The basketball player who is also an all-star baseball and football player who has a 4.0 and is socially charming is out there for sure. That's not the norm though.  I hope we are raising our kids to see that it is okay, and maybe even desired to do a couple of things and do them well.  Take the time to perfect a skill, not just dabble in several. 

At the end of the day it doesn't really matter how much we got accomplished or how many sports' jerseys we wore.  It's about what we did with our time, how we treated those we were with, and maybe even how we appreciated the natural beauty around us.  It's food for our souls to be able to breathe, to be bored (yes, I said it!), and to have extra time to just be.  Being still and silent (or at least tolerably quiet) gets lost in the busyness our society has created. 

I hope that my kids will look back on their childhood and appreciate and long for the quiet and time they were given to grow and thrive into who they will become!

A New School Year Begins

As is tradition we started school this week since Brett started going back full time for meetings! Students start next week for him. 

I did the bulk of my prep work throughout the summer and only had a a handful of work to do last minute.  I, as always, underestimated the amount of time I would need, and also underestimated what I would be capable of 2 weeks after having a baby. 

Our first week this year hasn't been ideal, or even close!  In fact at the end of Day 1 I was quite serious in my appeal to my husband when I asked if we could maybe hire both a tutor and a nanny.  It was *that* good of a day.  Oh dear! My poor husband. He and I had a meeting the evening of the first day and re-thought my approach for this year.  The rest of the week has been getting better and better each day.  Today (day 4) is a little bit of an exception since I had a big day and evening yesterday and had to take my 3 week postpartum self to bed because I clearly had overdone things.  Ugh.  I did get a chance to work with the kiddos who need me before I called it quits for the day so that's good. 

So, without further ado....the obligatory "back to school" photos:

 I'm not doing any formal anything with Isabella this year or next year.  She is sporting a backwards dress-up dress in the above picture.  She's been doing a good job of just going along with whatever we're doing.  She's part of "Ora Time" and our read aloud every day, but beyond that she just plays. When she asks to do school I hand her a piece of paper and a pair of scissors and tell her to cut. 

 Marciana is quite easily the brightest little one we have.  She is always thinking (and always expressing whatever it is that she's thinking).  Last year she taught herself all the numbers and letters and started sounding out words.  With my "Kindergarteners" I usually just focus on teaching how to read and basic math skills.  However, this one always wants to be "doing school" so she's doing science with us and history when she feels like it. 

 Felicity is plugging away where she left off last year.  I'll write more about this later, but the short story is that she's clearly not at "grade level" (whatever that means).  She's making great progress already this year.  I think this will be the year she really takes off.

Veronica has grown so much over the summer.  She is mostly doing independent work, only joins me for a little science this year.  She's a list-checker-offer and a rule follower, which is awesome, except for when the pages assigned for her history reading don't line up with the book!  Oops.

Gianna is just a fraction shorter than Emma. If we hadn't switched to a virtual charter school (more on that later) a few years ago she would be in 8th grade, but alas, she has a February birthday so the grade level for her age it is.  She'll be taking clarinet this year and Brett will still teach her piano. She's ready to be "farmed out", but Brett is having too much fun with her.

Emma is loving her classes this year so far. She especially is enjoying the British Literature course she's doing. It starts with Beowulf so if she's already liking it I'll consider that a bonus (not a favorite story of mine) She'll start orchestra in a couple of weeks.  She made the top youth orchestra this year and will be playing piccolo and flute. 

We all laughed when I took these pictures because I'm pretty sure every year Aidan makes the same silly face, and every year I tell him I'm going to post it. 

That's better. A big junior this year! We've recently started discussing future plans which is a bit surreal as I sit and snuggle a newborn, trying to wrap my mind around my first baby leaving home. Aidan has his driver's permit and will hopefully get his last driving time in and take his test soon.  We are really in no hurry to have him drive (or to pay for insurance).

And then there's Ephraem. Although he's as sweet as can be and we all love him dearly, he's not the happiest baby we've had.  We're still figuring each other out and I know we'll get into a good routine soon.

He's Here!

Introducing Ephraem Andrew!

He's 8lbs. of deliciousness!  This sweet baby has already carved out a huge spot in our family, and we're all absolutely madly in love with him!

He was baptized at just 5 days old (other than Felicity, I think that's the youngest).  His godfather (far right), will be leaving soon to study Canon Law in Canada and we wanted to make sure he was here for the Baptism!  It was beautiful and wonderful and the smell of chrism has just now faded a bit.  

I'm trying my hardest to rest and recover from this little man's entrance.  I'm finding myself getting a wee bit impatient, and wanting to just jump back into life, but I am trying to take the time I need to care for myself...having a sweet baby to snuggle with all day sure does help! 

Stuck

The above is a picture of our way into town.  A couple nights ago we had a monster storm that dumped nearly a foot (!!!!!!) of rain on us.  We went into town the next morning for Mass, but as we crossed this bridge and another further north I wondered aloud to Brett if he thought we should even be going to town.  We went to Mass and booked it home.  Sometime that night, with no extra rainfall, the bridge gave way.  There is rumor that a detour has been established, but no official word on where that is. We have a lake and large state park to get around so it's looking like we may have to go a handful miles south in order to get to a place where we can go north.  Might double the amount of time it takes to get to town.  Looks like I'll be hanging out at home quite a bit this summer since I'm also not convinced that our big van is going to make it very far on the detour road, which is a horrible road under good conditions.

I'm so very grateful that we are all safe, our house stayed dry, and I'm not due to have this baby boy for another 6 weeks or so.  I've already had a chat with him about staying put until his official eviction date.  I'm pretty sure he'll obey.  Pretty sure that bridge will be out for the rest of the summer, but at least by then there will be a clear and established way to get to town.

And this photo is of the smaller of the two waterfalls that are near us.  Usually there are two distinct stream/small falls going down the rock face.  What rock face you say?  Exactly!  Shortly after taking this picture we saw a huge tree fly over the falls.  Pretty incredible!